A Letter from Iris (she's gone!)

[Iris 0]

Dear Friends,

 

If events have fallen out as I have hoped, then you should be reading this post before Liverella has had a chance to delete it.

 

It seems that by some stroke of disaster, I have fallen through a ter-angreal. Actually, I have a strong suspicion that Liverella in fact pushed me through it. After all, it wasn't in our living room yesterday, and my last view of your world was Liverella's normally beautiful face contorted into a rictus, satsified snarl. I am still not sure of her motivations, although I do believe she was jealous of having to share the same Warder (we were first-sisters by Aiel custom), as well as jealous of my literary ingenuity. She always was a very vain woman.

 

But alas, her plans did not go completely as desired. I happened to be holding my laptop at the moment she pushed me through (of course, I'm always holding my laptop, so I'm not sure why she didn't foresee that). Then again, I do have all the brains even if she has all the beauty.

 

As a result, I am trapped in this alternate world. However I don't mind it really, as the DSL connection here is top-notch, and I can sit quietly and write fanfics all day instead of listening to Liverella jabber in her chiming voice or hear her kids whine. Really, if I find a way to smuggle my favorite tea into this world, then really I'll be set for life.

 

However, I will no longer be able to share my fanfics with you, despite the fact that I am obviously able to hack into Liverella's account. She is too modest to tolerate their content being posted under her name and will therefore delete them as soon as I post them.

 

Perhaps I will find some other way to share my fanfics with you. I happened to write one today that was, in my opinion, a comedic success, entitled "Moiraine and Lan Go to the Grocery Store." Really, it is rather tame, so perhaps she'll let that one through, especially if she gets to take all the credit. She was always one to enjoy a good ego-stroking.

 

My final advice, do not trust Liverella. Despite her outward charm she is a cunning, manipulative woman. I think she may even be Black Ajah. After all, what sort of a woman combines the name of a body part and the name of a princess as her alias? It wreaks of something dark and tainted (and is in poor literary taste in my opinion).

 

It has been a pleasure.

 

I will do well (I hope).

 

Iris

[Olivia 26]

See you in 7 books.

[Kaitlin 22]

What is this grocery store fanfic you speak of? Hopefully liverella will be able to let some of them through!

[jan 14]

*perk* Grocery fanfic?!

 

See you in 7 books.

 

Ha ha

[Iris 0]

*still contemplating potential risks of posting grocery store fanfic*

[Asmodean82 0]

Call me paranoid, but this Forsaken Gleeman is beginning to suspect that Liverella or Iris or both, is really another Forsaken, driven mad by imprisonment in the bore and the grinding of the Wheel. Either that... or she's simply talking to herself. Either way sounds fun to me. I just want to know how to proceed.

 

*Strum of the harp and a sudden disappearance*